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Poems for Funerals

Here is a selection of my favourite poems which might provide you with some ideas of poems you want to read, ask a family member or friend to read or ask your celebrant to read at the service.

Funeral poems

Despite knowing
they won’t be here long
they still choose to live
their brightest lives

Sunflowers - Rupi Kaur

YOU DON’T JUST LOSE SOMEONE ONCE You lose them over and over, sometimes in the same day. When the loss, momentarily forgotten, creeps up, and attacks you from behind. Fresh waves of grief as the realisation hits home, they are gone. Again. You don’t just lose someone once, you lose them every time you open your eyes to a new dawn, and as you awaken, so does your memory, so does the jolting bolt of lightning that rips into your heart, they are gone. Again. Losing someone is a journey, not a one-off. There is no end to the loss, there is only a learned skill on how to stay afloat, when it washes over. Be kind to those who are sailing this stormy sea, they have a journey ahead of them, and a daily shock to the system each time they realise, they are gone, Again. You don’t just lose someone once, you lose them every day, for a lifetime. Donna Ashworth

DON'T CRY FOR ME Don't cry for me now I have died, for I'm still here I'm by your side, My body's gone but my soul is here, please don't shed another tear, I am still here I'm all around, only my body lies in the ground. I am the snowflake that kisses your nose, I am the frost, that nips your toes. I am the sun, bringing you light, I am the star, shining so bright. I am the rain, refreshing the earth, I am the laughter, I am the mirth. I am the bird, up in the sky, I am the cloud, that's drifting by. I am the thoughts, inside your head, While I'm still there, I can't be dead. Anon

REMEMBER ME To the living, I am gone, To the sorrowful, I will never return, To the angry, I was cheated, But to the happy, I am at peace, And to the faithful, I have never left. I cannot speak, but I can listen. I cannot be seen, but I can be heard. So as you stand upon a shore gazing at a beautiful sea, As you look upon a flower and admire its simplicity, Remember me. Remember me in your heart: Your thoughts, and your memories, Of the times we loved, The times we cried, The times we fought, The times we laughed. For if you always think of me, I will never have gone. Margaret Mead

SHE IS GONE (HE IS GONE) You can shed tears that she is gone Or you can smile because she has lived You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her Or you can be full of the love that you shared You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday You can remember her and only that she is gone Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back Or you can do what she would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on. David Harkins

PARDON ME FOR NOT GETTING UP Oh dear, if you're reading this right now, I must have given up the ghost. I hope you can forgive me for being Such a stiff and unwelcoming host. Just talk amongst yourself my friends, And share a toast or two. For I am sure you will remember well How I loved to drink with you. Don't worry about mourning me, I was never easy to offend. Feel free to share a story at my expense And we'll have a good laugh at the end. Anon

COME WITH ME God saw you getting tired And a cure was not to be So He put His arms around you And whispered ‘Come with Me.’ With tearful eyes We watched you suffer And saw you fade away, Although we loved you dearly We could not make you stay. A golden heart stopped beating, Hard working hands at rest, God broke our hearts to prove He only takes the best. It’s lonesome here without you, We miss you more each day, Life doesn’t seem the same Since you’ve gone away. When days are sad and lonely And everything goes wrong, We seem to hear you whisper ‘Cheer up and carry on.’ Each time we see your picture, You seem to smile and say ‘Don’t cry, I’m in God’s keeping We’ll meet again someday.’ You never said ‘I’m leaving’, You never said goodbye, You were gone before we knew it, And only God knew why. A million times we needed you, A million times we cried, If love alone could have saved you, You never would have died. In life we loved you dearly, In death we love you still , In our hearts you hold a place, That no one could ever fill. It broke our hearts to lose you, But you didn’t go alone, For part of us went with you, The day God took you home. Rhonda Braswell

LET ME GO When I’m gone don’t fret over the things I left behind you don’t need those trinkets to remember what we had. And if you fear the forgetting I will remind you when you sleep and you will wake up smiling don’t let that turn to tears for I meant to bring joy. When I’m gone don’t fuss over my house or my clothes or my organs give them all away for they mean nothing where I am and someone who has time left could use them very much. When I am gone fight that sadness and only let it fly its flag On days when you most need to. My birthday should be celebrated still for I was alive and I lived and that must be remembered above all. When I’m gone let me go my love and say my name often for I think that will be the sign I need to come from wherever I may be. But when I do don’t say you miss me because that I already know. Donna Ashworth

INSIDE OUT Get used to grief my friends for once it calls it does not take its leave an unwanted guest but a guest non the less and a guest we must receive Get used to grief my friend for once it’s with you it sticks like sea to shore the folks who grieve get no reprieve just the learning to live once more. Get used to grief my friend for when it arrives it won’t be escorted out so usher it in let the grief win it’s love turned inside out. Donna Ashworth

THE LOSS OF A MOTHER is an inevitable part of our life. We know it must come around and we know the day will hurt but we are not prepared never prepared for the tearing. The tearing of a part of our soul from its very seams stitches pulled asunder heart wrenched in half soul split in two. But that tearing is not what you may think it is not her leaving you it is the loss of her physical form which you have been so very used and attached to. And for now she must remove that part for it no longer serves you and you no longer need it despite what you may think. Because she made you well and she built all of her love into you Cell by cell thought by though lesson by lesson And the split that you fell is simply the new way you will carry on your love for your mother with your mother just in a different way for she did not leave mothers cannot leave they are in you look inside she’s there and that is unable to be taken now that is all yours to keep forevermore. Donna Ashworth

THE LOSS OF A FATHER Is the anchor pulled from the seabed the steering wheel unhinged the mast split by lightening and the bow broken by storm The ship you sail now feels unsafe no longer weatherproof without direction or brave heart to speed its way. Perhaps you did not even know that he was your compass that you gazed upon his lead like a north star in the night. He gave you all of this you see without notice or congratulation diligently consistently continuously guiding always showing the way in the way he knew how. And whilst you are cast adrift I know this to be true you will anchor yourself once more when you realise that his voice still speaks still guides still brings a brave heart your way in the roughest of storms. And the answers you seek he already planted deep for he knew one day you would need to sail alone. So he buried little pieces of himself within your heart your mind your spirit and your soul little breadcrumbs of love to show the way home. Donna Ashworth

GREAT GRIEF Don’t fall out of love with the world because they no longer live in it. Instead be grateful that this world produced them be glad that this life ever existed and that you were blessed enough to love them then and love them still. Don’t fall out of love with this world because it could not keep your heart whole instead let love be the glue patch it up and fill it with joy joy that you know first-hand in this bittersweet conundrum That great grief is born only of great love. Donna Ashworth

I LET GO OF YOUR HAND I don’t recall the day I stopped holding your hand was I ten maybe younger I wonder if you noticed that I had let it go for the final time? I held your hand again so many years later at the end and that bittersweet image will stay with me for evermore. And I long for all the days in between when your hand stayed without mine. Days where I did not wrap your hand with love inside my own and I wonder why not? I would give anything I own to hold that hand one more time And when I get the chance again I will not let go so easily. Donna Ashworth

When Great Trees Fall, by Maya Angelou When great trees fall,
 rocks on distant hills shudder,
 lions hunker down
 in tall grasses,
 and even elephants
 lumber after safety.

 When great trees fall
 in forests,
 small things recoil into silence,
 their senses
 eroded beyond fear.

 When great souls die,
 the air around us becomes
 light, rare, sterile.
 We breathe, briefly. Our eyes, briefly,
 see with
 a hurtful clarity.
 Our memory, suddenly sharpened,
 examines,
 gnaws on kind words
 unsaid,
 promised walks
 never taken.
 Great souls die and
 our reality, bound to
 them, takes leave of us.
 Our souls,
 dependent upon their
 nurture,
 now shrink, wizened.
 Our minds, formed
 and informed by their
 radiance,
fall away.
 We are not so much maddened
 as reduced to the unutterable ignorance
of dark, cold
 caves.

 And when great souls die,
 after a period peace blooms,
 slowly and always
 irregularly. Spaces fill
 with a kind of
 soothing electric vibration.
 Our senses, restored, never
 to be the same, whisper to us.
 They existed. They existed.
 We can be. Be and be
 better. For they existed.

Remember Me, by Margaret Mead To the living, I am gone, To the sorrowful, I will never return, To the angry, I was cheated, But to the happy, I am at peace, And to the faithful, I have never left. I cannot speak, but I can listen. I cannot be seen, but I can be heard. So as you stand upon a shore gazing at a beautiful sea, As you look upon a flower and admire its simplicity, Remember me. Remember me in your heart: Your thoughts, and your memories, Of the times we loved, The times we cried, The times we fought, The times we laughed. For if you always think of me, I will never have gone.

A Song Of Living, by Amelia Josephine Burr Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die. I have sent up my gladness on wings, to be lost in the blue of the sky. I have run and leaped with the rain, I have taken the wind to my breast. My cheek like a drowsy child to the face of the earth I have pressed. Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die. I have kissed young love on the lips, I have heard his song to the end, I have struck my hand like a seal in the loyal hand of a friend. I have known the peace of heaven, the comfort of work done well. I have longed for death in the darkness and risen alive out of hell. Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die. I gave a share of my soul to the world, when and where my course is run. I know that another shall finish the task I surely must leave undone. I know that no flower, nor flint was in vain on the path I trod. As one looks on a face through a window, through life I have looked on God, Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.

Gone From My Sight by Henry Van Dyke I am standing upon the seashore. A ship, at my side, spreads her white sails to the moving breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand and watch her until, at length, she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other. Then, someone at my side says, "There, she is gone." Gone where? Gone from my sight. That is all. She is just as large in mast, hull and spar as she was when she left my side. And, she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port. Her diminished size is in me -- not in her. And, just at the moment when someone says, "There, she is gone," there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices ready to take up the glad shout, "Here she comes!" And that is dying...

Blessing for the Brokenhearted There is no remedy for love but to love more. – Henry David Thoreau Let us agree for now that we will not say the breaking makes us stronger or that it is better to have this pain than to have done without this love. Let us promise we will not tell ourselves time will heal the wound, when every day our waking opens it anew. Perhaps for now it can be enough to simply marvel at the mystery of how a heart so broken can go on beating, as if it were made for precisely this— as if it knows the only cure for love is more of it, as if it sees the heart’s sole remedy for breaking is to love still, as if it trusts that its own persistent pulse is the rhythm of a blessing we cannot begin to fathom but will save us nonetheless. - Jan Richardson

Funeral When I go from this place dress the porch with garlands as you would for a wedding my dear pull the people from their homes and dance in the streets when death arrives like a bride at the aisle send me off in my brightest clothing serve ice cream with rose petals to our guests there's no reason to cry my dear I have waited my whole life for such beauty to take my breath away when I go let it be a celebration for I have been here I have lived I have won at this game called life - Rupi Kaur

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone, Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone, Silence the pianos and with muffled drum Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come. Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead, Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves, Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves. He was my North, my South, my East and West, My working week and my Sunday rest, My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song; I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong. The stars are not wanted now: put out every one; Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun; Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood; For nothing now can ever come to any good. W H Auden

I Put a Ladder Up to Heaven I put a ladder up to heaven To see if you were there But all that I could find Were fluffy white clouds everywhere I looked around for ages But still I saw no sign No golden gates or angels No loved ones that are mine I found there only sunshine And rainbows in the sky It wasn't as l'd always dreamed And I could only question "why?" I climbed back down the ladder, feeling sad and all alone. If my loved ones weren't in heaven Then where had they all gone? My heart was filled with sorrow, My eyes cried grief filled tears, I thought you were in heaven For all these broken years. But now I'd found you weren't, That heavens just a dream, My heart and soul feel broken I don't know what this means. Then deep within me I feel peace And your voice speaks to me. "I'm with you always, in your heart, It's where I'll always be" "Dry your tears, don't be afraid' Your ladder: put away" "You won't find me in heaven I'm right beside you every day." A Wilson

Death is Nothing At All Death is nothing at all. I have only slipped away to the next room. I am I and you are you. Whatever we were to each other, That, we still are. Call me by my old familiar name. Speak to me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference into your tone. Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me. Pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. Let it be spoken without effect. Without the trace of a shadow on it. Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same that it ever was. There is absolute unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you. For an interval. Somewhere. Very near. Just around the corner. All is well. Henry Scott Holland

Memories in the Heart Feel no guilt in laughter, she knows how much you care Feel no sorrow in a smile that she’s not here to share You cannot grieve forever, she would not want you to She’d hope that you can carry on, the way you always do So talk about the good times and the ways you showed you cared The days you spent together, all the happiness you shared Let memories surround you. A word someone may say Will suddenly recapture a time, an hour, a day That brings her back as clearly as though she were still here And fills you with the feelings that she is always near For if you keep these moments, you will never be apart And she will live forever locked safe within your heart Unknown Author

The Dash I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend. He referred to the dates on his casket from beginning to the end. He noted that first came the date of his birth, and spoke of the following date with tears, But he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years. For that dash represents all the time that he spent alive on earth, And now, only those who loved him know what that little line is worth. For it matters not, how much we own, the cars, the house, the cash, What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash. So think about this long and hard; are there things you would like to change? For you never know how much time is left that can still be rearranged. If we could just slow down enough to consider what is true and real And always try to understand the way other people feel. And be less quick to anger and show appreciation more And love the people in our lives like we have never loved before. If we treat each other with respect and more often wear a smile, Remembering that this special dash might only last a little while. So when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash, Would you be proud of the things they say, about how your spent your dash? Linda Ellis

A Long Cup of Tea Death is too negative for me So I’ll be popping off for a long cup of tea Do splash out on two tea bags in the pot And for God’s sake keep the water hot Please pick the biggest mug you can find Size really does matter at this time I’ll pass on the lapsang with that souchong And that stuff with bergamot And stick with my favourite friend You know the English breakfast blend Breakfast! Thanks for reminding me There’s just time before I fail To stand on ceremony Two rashers of best back, should keep me Smelling sweet up the smokestack So, mother, put the kettle on for me It’s time, mother, for my long cup of tea. Michael Ashby

“Taking care of others, helping others, ultimately is the way to discover your own joy and to have a happy life.”

Dalai Lama

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